How to Overcome Victim Blaming

Victim blaming happens when people blame victims of crime, trauma and hardship. They assume that a victim must have done something to cause the incident and that they could have avoided it by being more careful or making different choices. It’s a pervasive and harmful reaction that can discourage survivors from reporting abuse. It also deprives them of the empathy and support they deserve.

Whether it’s out and out hatred or simply a warped belief, it’s all too common to hear victims of rape or other crimes be blamed. When news breaks of a sexual assault, for example, many people immediately turn their attention to what the victim was wearing or doing at the time. They may ask why they were out so late or question what they were thinking or saying that might have provoked the attacker.

It’s even more alarming when people close to a survivor start victim-blaming them as well. For example, if a friend of yours has an abusive partner, you might find yourself arguing with them about why they haven’t left the relationship or why they didn’t speak up sooner. You might be tempted to think they’re just being overdramatic or that you can just talk it out with them.

However, the truth is that it’s not always about the victim’s fault. Rather, it’s often a result of a psychological phenomenon known as the fundamental attribution error – which involves attributing other people’s behaviour to internal, personal characteristics and ignoring external forces that might have played a role.

The good news is that victim blaming can be overcome. The first step is to understand that it’s rooted in a person’s own worldview and perception of what it means to be safe. “People tend to believe that bad things happen to those who deserve them or are in some way deserving,” says Dr Laura Niemi, a postdoctoral fellow in social psychology at Harvard University and co-author of the new study. “As a consequence, they feel safer by assuming that they would never become a victim.”

But it’s not just a reluctance to empathise with victims; it’s a fear reaction triggered by our natural desire to stay alive and keep ourselves safe. That’s why it’s important for everyone to be aware of their own tendency to victim-blame, and what they can do to prevent it from happening.

So next time you hear someone telling a victim of rape or other form of harm that they should have been more careful, be more trustworthy or speak up earlier, don’t let them get away with it. Tell them that they’re exhibiting victim blaming and why it is so damaging.